Putting My Finger on a Good Blog Topic

Note: This piece was originally written for the Greeley Tribune as a parenting blog.

When you write for a parenting blog, it's not always easy to come up with fresh material each week. Raising children certainly keeps life interesting, but new observations, profound revelations, and entertaining stories don't always present themselves within a span of seven days. That's when you find yourself wracking your brain to come up with something interesting from your past, or perhaps a top 10 list - anything that readers might enjoy, and can be typed up before your submission deadline hits.

I was having one of those uneventful spans two weeks ago, but I was convinced that if I just waited until that Saturday, I would be presented with some interesting material. That would be the day of a school chess tournament that my 9 year-old son was participating in.

I had a spiral notebook open in front of me that morning as I watched my son compete in the tournament against other students in a large room. I contemplated several blog topics during that time. The first one had to do with my son losing his first match in about a minute's time - something I didn't even realize was possible with my limited knowledge of the game. The second one had to do with the ridiculous power trip one of the adults working the registration table was on. After a while, I thought about doing the blog on how much fun my son was having (laughing and joking around with his opponents), even though he wasn't coming up on the winning end of any of his matches.

It was between tournament rounds, however, when what I felt was the best blog topic started rearing its head. After each game, my son wanted to go with me to the parking lot right outside the school and shoot baskets. It's something we almost never do because neither of us really like basketball. However, because the people who organized the tournament wanted to keep the kids busy and out of their hair when they weren't in front of a chess board, they brought a few balls for outside play.

It was a great idea, and we had a lot of fun. Neither one of us were taking it very seriously. We were just shooting some hoops, passing the ball back and forth, and having a good father/son conversation. That was going to be the gist of my blog - something about the unexpected, pleasant distraction of bonding with my son in the midst of a serious school competition.

Right as it was about time to head back inside for round four of the tournament, I took a quick shot. The ball bounced off the bottom of the rim and flew back at me pretty quickly. I got my left hand up to try and tap it back toward the rim, and that's when I felt my pinky finger jam.

We've all felt that sensation before when playing sports. It typically smarts for a minute or so, and then we carry on. That's what I would have done too, if I hadn't raised my hand to find my pinky jetted out to the side of my hand at a sick, completely unnatural angle.

I was stunned by the horrendous sight of it, and was sure my finger had to be broken even though it honestly didn't hurt all that much. My next thought was that I didn't want my son to see it. He had no idea I had even hurt myself and I wanted to keep it that way because he was having a really good time at the tournament. I didn't want to put a damper on things by freaking him out with his father's deformed digit.

I casually walked with him inside, keeping my hand from his view, and watched him pair up with his next chess opponent at a table. That's when I called my wife and told her what happened. I knew that if I waited for her to get to the building, she'd insist on taking me to the hospital. Since that would have likely meant my son being pulled from the tournament early to come with us, I clued another parent in on what was happening, and asked her to tell my son that his mother was on the way if he happened to finish his match before she got there. I then drove myself to the hospital.

As it turns out, the finger was not broken. It was just badly dislocated. It was reset, wrapped up, and I was sent on my way after a couple of hours. My son finished his chess tournament and brought home an eighth place ribbon that he was actually pretty excited about.

"I wouldn't have freaked out if I had seen your finger, Dad," he later told me. "I would have thought it was pretty cool!"

Let's hear it for desensitization, folks!

In the grand scheme of things, having my sore, swollen, stiff pinky taped to my ring finger for ten days isn't exactly terrible. It certainly hasn't kept me from posting pictures of the original injury out on Facebook to gross out my friends. But being that I write multiple columns each week and that I'm working hard on my second book, it's pretty darned irritating. I had to invent a new method of typing just to finish this blog, which took me about two full hours.

On the bright side, at least I wasn't left without a topic to write about this week.

Let's Keep Making Monsters

Note: This piece was originally written for the Greeley Tribune.

Last year, I wrote a column on an experience my family and I had at the Distortions Unlimited warehouse in Greeley. That's where the immensely talented Ed Edmunds and his crew create monsters for the dark amusement industry. Their props, masks and other creations have been featured all over the world at haunted houses, conventions and even onstage at concerts.

We all had a blast that day, learning how Distortions' nightmarish works of art are produced, and getting to meet Ed and his wife Marsha. They're both very friendly people.

At that time, I had yet to watch their television show "Making Monsters" that was airing on the Travel Channel. This was because I didn't know the series existed until a couple of months earlier when Greeley Unexpected began featuring Ed and Marsha on billboards and local commercials.

The third season of Making Monsters was to start shortly after our trip to the warehouse, so I was interested in seeing the premiere. To tell you the truth, I wasn't sure what to expect; I'm not much of a fan of reality television. In fact, if I hadn't just met the show's stars and come away feeling some Greeley pride, I might have not even given it a chance.

Boy, am I glad that I did. I quickly found out it was a well-produced, unique, incredibly entertaining show - one that completely hooked not only me, but my entire family. The Edmunds live in an extremely fascinating world, alongside a colorful cast of dedicated, talented people. I enjoyed learning more about them and their industry.

We liked watching the creative process of taking a general vision defined by a customer, and then designing, producing, and ultimately installing a hair-raising, jaw-dropping spectacle. Witnessing the pride in the Edmunds' eyes and the smiles on their faces as their end-creations evoked screams and shrills from haunted house patrons always made for good TV.

My wife laughed at the quibbling between Ed and Jordu Schell. Jordu is an accomplished Hollywood sculptor whose work has been featured in numerous films. His theatrical personality and comical steadfastness resulted in some genuinely hilarious segments as the two men routinely challenged each other to create the best possible product. Their propensity to pull practical jokes on each other was also a lot of fun to watch.

I was intrigued by the numerous glances into the business-side of an industry driven by artistic expression. When one looks at the imaginative products created by Distortions Unlimited, it's easy to forget that the company is in business to make money. The show explored the relationship between creativity and capitalism. One time it came in the form of a frank discussion about whether or not the artists would do what they do for free. Another time, it was about how the materials and shipping weight for certain products needed to be scaled back for the merchandise to remain profitable.

Highlighting such things might not seem all that notable, but it kind of is - especially in today's culture where the benefits of choices are often recognized but the costs associated with them aren't. In that sense, I think my kids learned a few valuable lessons from the show.

Speaking of kids, Making Monsters was a far more family-friendly show than anyone would have expected, considering that the subject matter included gory creatures and unsettling imagery. There were never any angry tirades or foul language, and no one was ever demeaned the way they are in many shows in the reality genre. Refreshingly, Ed Edmunds even expressed his frustration with the sexualization of the Halloween industry. A strong work ethic was promoted each week, as was a "never give up until it's done" attitude.

For those reasons and more, I was disappointed when Distortions Unlimited posted the below message on their official Facebook page last month:

"Travel Channel has decided not to renew MAKING MONSTERS. It's been wonderful being a part of such an awesome project for the past 3 seasons! We've loved working with everyone at Travel ... and our film crew is absolutely the best!! ... so much fun! Thanks so much to all our customers and to everyone that watches the show ... you guys are the best! Please stay tuned ... we may not be filming MAKING MONSTERS, but Distortions is still making monsters ... forever.

- Ed & Marsha and our super crew (the monsters couldn't happen without you guys!!)"

While I'm used to television shows I like eventually going off the air, this retirement felt a bit more discouraging than the others. This is partially due to the local aspect. The city of Greeley and a group of its fine citizens were highlighted each and every week to a national (probably international) audience. That was pretty neat! My primary beef, however, was that it was simply a great show - one that would have likely become a ratings hit had it only received more mainstream exposure. The fact I live in Greeley and didn't even know about it until its third season was evidence of how poorly promoted it was by the Travel Channel and its conglomerates.

Just when I begrudgingly accepted that all good things must come to an end, I recently learned of a serious movement to get Making Monsters back on the air, either through a return to the Travel Channel or as a new offering on the Syfy Channel. There's a Facebook page that is coordinating both efforts through online petitions.

I have no idea of how likely the endeavor is to succeed, but it seems to me that the good people of Greeley could do a favor for a couple of their distinguished citizens, and for the general viewing public, by jumping on board and simply adding their names to the movement.

We need more quality shows like Making Monsters on television, especially when they're filmed in our own backyard. If you want to help, just check out the Facebook page I mentioned earlier. https://www.facebook.com/LetsGetMakingMonstetsonSyFy.